(Illustration by Carmen Moser )
why do you hurt so much?
does it pain that much?
it is understandable, bud
but why do you hurt others?
do you feel their sighs and tears will fill your scars up?
what makes you feel better?
making others feel happy or
insulting them to ashes?
contradicting your own virtues and morals in attempts to look tough?
does overpowering others make you feel better about yourself?
I understand it is hard to put yourself together, but well?
does that give you the right to make fun of people for your own merriment?
a heartless cruel sadistic boy you are becoming
and not tough at all
you wish you were tough
you say now you shall think more with your brain than your heart
because that way you will live life logically
are you happy?
you wanted “metamorphisis”
but day by day you degrade further
here’s an advice
don’t become someone you would hate
if you look inside yourself and find darkness
then you aren’t lovable at all
your colors have faded to grey-scale
you are turning into something wrong
not necessarily something sinister
something really wrong
something unguided, scared, weak
who belittles others to make themselves feel strong
but you are
cry and scream all you want
these words shall remain here
dated 7th July 2017
and you shall come back to read this years later
for then I will have one question for you
do you love yourself?
if its a no
then I hate you too
don’t become someone you’d hate
stop mocking the people closest to you
don’t vent it out on others
put a leash on your humor
because I know you won’t apologize
maybe its too late to teach you how to do that
so I will only tell you to
not hurt others
let us be honest here
you don’t like how you behave
you say its just a phase
after which it will all be fine
like a wall that you will climb
and paradise on the other side you will find
that is what you say when starting a transition
that you will change
that is not how it works
there was no wall to begin with
you are what you are right now
change doesn’t come overnight
it takes months and years
and it is happening now
it never stops
love yourself a little more
smile more at others
even if you don’t want to
don’t give in to solitude
don’t let it consume you
and plant deviance inside of you
you need more light inside
more stars to decorate your planes
more moons to keep you calm
barren land is one thing
barren sky is another
latter is utter darkness
where life withers
don’t be like that